Lyrics for
The 3rd Annual DWLZ Conference

How Do You Like Dot Now?
Words by Al, and sung to the tune of "How Do You Like Me Now?"

(Verse 1)
Yeah she was always the heavy one, the one where they poked the fun,
Sometimes she just wanted to lay down and die.
She tried to lose her weight you know,
It always would go real slow,
And then the weight came back and she’d break down and cry.
She wanted so badly to be thin and healthy,
But her will power seemed far too weak,
And then all at once she climbed up that mountain,
and now she lives on its peak. How do you like her now?
(chorus)
How do you like Dot now? Now that she’s on her way?
No one thought that she’d be -- standing here today.
Now she’s climbed the mountain, she wants you to do it too.
That’s why she made the web page, How do you like Dot now?

(Verse 2)
It started off just a little thing, an Internet iffy fling,
Never imagined it’d go half this far.
Then the restaurants and recipes
The helpful hints and niceties, they all seemed to really catch on.
Her pictures of before, and then those of after,
Showed how her weight had really gone.
The guest book was filling, the emails were thrilling,
And next thing the conference was on! How do you like Dot now?
(Repeat Chorus twice)

D.W.L.Z.
Words modified and sung by Al to the tune of
"Surfin' in the USA"

Well, you've heard of the web page, D-W-L-Z
It getting real hot now, from sea to shining sea,
Over 14 million have dropped in to see,
What Dotti's got cookin' at D-W-L-Z.

They're coming in from Texas,
Massachusetts too,
And from way down under,
And I'm Telling you,
The pounds are droppin'
And it's clear to see,
Things are jumpin' at Dotti's
D-W-L-Z!

Now twenty thousand are lurking,
Or posting every day,
Talking to each other,
Supporting all the way,
And here we are at the conference
Anyone can see,
Things are jumpin' at Dotti's
D-W-L-Z!

We're counting our points, now
We're drinkin' water too.
We're all on a journey
Our weight loss skies are blue
We're climbing that mountain,
Just come and see,
Things are jumpin' at Dotti's
D-W-L-Z!

These Old Clothes
Words modified and sung by Al to the tune of
"This Old House"

(Verse 1)
These Old Clothes I once selected
For their fit more than their looks,
These Old Clothes were on the plus rack,
Not in the fashion nooks.
These Old Clothes just fit around me,
And they covered up my shame,
But now that is all over,
And loudly I proclaim:

(Chorus)
Ain’t gonna need these clothes no longer
Ain’t gonna need these clothes no more,
I’m too small to wear these pants now,
I’m too small, and that’s for sure.
I’m too small for my old wardrobe,
And it’s feeling really great,
Ain’t gonna need these clothes no longer,
Just like Dotti I lost my Weight.

(Verse 2)
These Old Clothes once knew my roundness
These Old Clothes once knew my hurt,
These Old Clothes were tight around me,
Poppin’ buttons off my shirt.
But their days on earth are numbered,
Ain’t got time for one more fling,
They’re headed for the trashcan now,
And you can hear me sing, (To Chorus)

(Verse 3)
These Old Clothes have served their purpose,
Now their work on earth is done,
I struggled hard to lose them
Yes, I struggled hard and won.
Hey! My new clothes are much smaller,
That’s because now I am too,
My heart feels like I’m flying,
And I am telling you... (To Chorus)

(Verse 4)
These Old Clothes remember sorrow,
These Old Clothes remember tears,
These Old Clothes saw me tired,
Through all those heavy years.
But now their work is over,
They did all that they could,
I ripped them from the closet,
And now they’re gone for good! (To Chorus)